


I'll never let you go

by Saysi



Series: For of all the things my hands have held, the best by far is you. [2]
Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: At least for a few chapters anyway, Cuddling & Snuggling, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Seriously just fluff at this point, Sickfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-22
Updated: 2018-04-27
Packaged: 2019-04-26 06:37:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14396391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saysi/pseuds/Saysi
Summary: Killua and Gon have finally found each other again.After spending nearly three years apart, how will they settle in to being one unit again?A sequel to [I'll look out for you] although it can be read as a standalone unit if you are so inclined :)





	1. Sleepless x Nights

Killua could hear giggles as he stuck his key in the front door, and he smiled to himself at the sound. They'd been travelling for days, stuck on airships and in the back of trucks, but finally they'd made it to the tiny little cottage that they would call home for the next few weeks. 

He kicked at the doorstep with his boots, sending snow cascading onto the wood, then pulled down his scarf to smile at the giggly pair waiting for him inside.

“Miss me?” he asked teasingly.

“Obviously,” Gon grinned, standing up to throw his arms around Killua's waist. “Welcome home.”

“Onii-chan, come meet our new friend!”

Killua was alarmed by the words, turning to Gon with wide eyes and getting a reassuring smile in return. He remained tucked under Killua's arm as they followed Alluka into the next room, and Killua was both relieved and concerned by the sight waiting for him.

Rolling around on the kitchen tiles was a little white cat, fluffy as all hell, with the biggest blue eyes he'd ever seen. The moment it saw Alluka return it jumped up to follow her, and she giggled again as it rubbed at her legs.

“We call him Kiki,” she informed him, scooping the cat up to hold in Killua's face.

“Kiki?”

“Uh-huh, 'cause he looks like you.”

Gon laughed at the unimpressed look that came over Killua's face, removing himself from Killua's hip to rub at the cat's fluffy cheeks. Killua pouted a little at the loss of Gon's hug, but did his best not to vocalise his complaints.

“Did you find any work, in the end?” Alluka asked, handing the fluffball over to Gon. “Anyone looking?”

“A little. Some basic security stuff going on, but I'm not sure they'll take me. Think I'm too young or whatever.”

“It's not your age,” Gon informed him. “You're just too cute.”

“Shut up.”

“I'm serious. No one is gonna look at you and be scared, not unless you're in Assassin mode already. You're too sweet looking.”

“How am I supposed to fix that?”

“It's not something that needs fixing.”

“Maybe I should go get a few tattoos. Or piercings. Or shave my head or something. Then maybe you wouldn't compare me to cats anymore, too.”

“Killua~” Gon sung, setting the cat down in favour of throwing his arms around Killua's neck lightly. “Don't be sulky, I like you cute.”

“I'm sure I told you to shut up.”

Gon grinned and planted a big, over-exaggerated kiss on Killua's cheek, watching as Killua's stubborn expression immediately softened a little. 

“I like you, Killua. Just the way you are. Don't change, okay?”

“Okay,” he sighed, managing a tiny smile. “You're a pain sometimes, you know?”

“I know!”

///

It was the middle of the night, pitch black out, and Killua was tossing and turning in bed. He was surprised he hadn't woken Gon up with it, honestly, but he still slept soundly across the mattress, one hand lightly woven into Killua's hair. 

Normally his problem was staying asleep, not getting there. He still woke frequently in the night covered in sweat, breathing hard, flashes of old memories and new fears running rampant in his mind. Lately, though, he woke to find Gon's hand in his, or his arm draped around his waist, and his presence calmed Killua pretty quickly.

This one was a whole new problem. This time he couldn't get to sleep in the first place, no matter how much he tried to relax and breathe and empty his mind. It was infuriating, it was uncomfortable, and it was going to leave Killua sulky again in the morning. 

Scratching in the hall put him on edge, his eyes widening as he looked toward the door, but the sounds were far too quiet, far too small. It took him a moment to catch on, and he rolled his eyes at himself when the little white furball nudged its way through the cracked door. 

“It's you, huh?” Killua grumbled, eyeing the thing that had taken away so much of his affection. “I suppose you want to sleep between us too, huh?”

“Mew.”

“Great, now I'm talking to a cat.”

He flopped onto his back, sighing again, but jumped when he felt a tiny pressure on his chest.

“Mew.”

“God damn it.”

The little cat was kneading at him now, purring like a rough motor, and soon it curled up on his chest and closed its eyes.

“At least one of us is getting some sleep, huh?”

He considered pushing the cat off but couldn't bring himself to be so mean – it wasn't like the cat had _tried_ to take his attention, after all. Instead he lay back and closed his eyes, sighing again as he listened to it purr atop his chest.

///


	2. Days x In x Bed

Killua woke up sniffling, grumbling to himself as he rubbed at his eyes, amazed at how damn tired he still was. The cat quickly jumped off his chest when it felt him moving, and soon Gon was stirring too, his grip on Killua's hair and hand loosening.

It was kind of cute, the way Gon clutched at him in his sleep. When it was cold enough they slept tangled in each other's limbs, but right now they'd cranked the heater up high to combat the chill of the snow outside, and if they slept too close they would wake up sweaty and gross. 

“Morning,” Gon smiled, planting a kiss on Killua's cheek. “Did you sleep okay?”

“It was fine.”

“Are you sure?” Gon asked, immediately suspicious. “You don't look great.”

“I'm okay.”

Gon levered himself up on one elbow to look, to consider Killua's expression, and after a moment he set his hand lightly on Killua's forehead.

“You feel warm, are you coming down with something?”

“I told you I'm fine.”

“I heard you sniffing too. I think you have a cold.”

“I don't get colds.”

“Then I'd better teach you how to handle it,” Gon smiled, leaning over to kiss Killua's cheek once more. “I'll be back in a moment, wait here for me.”

Killua contemplated following him stubbornly, but while he hated to admit it, he didn't feel great. It was true that he never got colds, never got sick, so maybe this was what it felt like. Maybe this was why he had been so crabby the night prior.

It was a good excuse, at any rate.

Gon returned before long with a box of tissues and a rubbish bin, setting them beside Killua's side of the bed, and a big bottle of water that went on the nightstand along with a little greenish bottle. There was a damp cloth in his hand too, and Killua softened a little when Gon gently wiped down his sweaty face with it.

“Get some rest, Killua. You'll feel better soon, I promise.”

“Wait, Gon.” Killua reached for him pitifully as he began to leave the room. 

“You want me to stay with you?” he smiled fondly.

“Do you mind?”

“Not at all. Just give me two minutes, okay?”

“Okay.”

Killua rolled over onto his side and curled up a little, tucking one arm around his pillow. His head was throbbing in a strange way, and his nose still felt stuffy, and he felt like he'd accepted his fate.

“I'm back,” Gon announced, as he bounded back into the room. “Incoming.”

He dove back into the blankets on his side of the bed and immediately curled into Killua's back, fitting himself into every curve.

“I turned the heater down,” Gon said quietly, “so I can stay here and cuddle with you and you won't feel gross. I mean, no grosser than you do from being sick, at least.”

“You don't have other stuff to do, do you?”

“Nothing at all. I'm just gonna stay here and take care of you, okay? You should drink some water.”

“Ugh.”

“Shall I come feed it to you?”

“No,” Killua blushed. “I can do it.”

“Fine.”

He reached for the bottle and unscrewed the gap, pulling a face as he gulped down what seemed like an acceptable amount of the liquid. It was bland and tasteless, but it was cold, and right now Killua liked that.

“I'm gonna blow my nose, cover your ears.”

“Never, then I'd have to stop hugging you.”

“Gon.”

“I didn't say don't do it, I just said I'm not letting go. I'm not gonna think you're gross, you're sick.”

“I might get you sick too, at this rate.”

“I'll be fine, I never get sick.”

“Yeah, me neither,” Killua pointed out stubbornly. “I don't want to make you sick.”

“I promise you won't. Now do your stuff and get back here.”

With a sigh he conceded, reaching for a tissue and doing his best to be delicate, to be somewhat quiet, as he cleared out his nose. As he threw the tissue in the bin he noticed the greenish bottle again, smiling faintly as he picked it up. The smell was strong, like paint stripper or something of the sort, but he knew it would do the job. He squirted a little out and rubbed it all over his hands, giving it a second to dry before he turned over to look at Gon.

“You really come prepared, don't you?”

“I knew you'd tell me you couldn't hug me because of germs. Now you're all clean and disinfected, so you can snuggle to your heart's content.”

“Okay. You're sure you have nowhere else to be?”

“I'm sure, Killua. This is your chance to be as pitiful and affectionate as you like, and blame it on being sick. Come on, do your worst.”

He didn't bother to protest or argue, the idea was too appealing. He wriggled in a little closer and felt Gon's arms tighten to match, and a little contented sigh escaped him as he buried his head in the crook of Gon's neck.

“Get some sleep, Killua. I'll be right here when you wake up, I promise.”

“You're the best, Gon,” Killua mumbled, his cheeks a little warm. “I really appreciate it.”

“I know you'd do the same for me.”

“Yeah. I would. Goodnight, Gon.”

“Sweet dreams Killua.”

///

By the time Killua woke up his body had well and truly succumb to his cold. His body ached, his head was pounding, and his sinuses felt like they could burst from his face. Despite himself a little whine escaped his lips, and he felt Gon's arm tighten around him.

“Not feeling good, huh?” he murmured into Killua's hair. “Can I do anything?”

“Don't leave.”

“Wouldn't dream of it.”

“I need to pee.”

“Of course you do,” Gon laughed. “Go on then.”

“Ugh.”

With a little smile Gon crawled out of bed, scooping Killua into his arms despite the grumbles it brought. He carried him down the hall to the bathroom before he set him down, simply grinning at the unimpressed look Killua shot him.

“Want me to come get you again when you're done?”

“No,” Killua pulled a face. “I'm fine.”

“You're not fine, you're sick. You're allowed to get sick.”

“Just let me pee.”

“Okay, have fun.”

Killua rolled his eyes, but Gon obediently shut the door behind him, leaving Killua to relieve himself. He blew his nose again then spent a moment leaning against the sink, staring at himself in the mirror.

“I'm a mess,” he muttered to himself. “God damn.”

He washed his hands and splashed some water on his face, rubbing at his eyes as he debated whether to attempt to get something done or to just go back to bed. He didn't get to consider it for long, though. Gon was waiting for him in the hallway, with his typical little contented smile, holding a steaming mug in his hands.

“Come on, back to bed.”

Killua didn't bother to argue with him, just nodded faintly and crawled back into the sheets, leaning against the pillows Gon had propped against the wall.

“Drink, it'll help.”

Gon set the mug in his hands and he took a sip obediently, finding the liquid tasted of chicken.

“So you've never been sick before? Like, ever?” Gon asked, as he climbed in beside Killua.

“Maybe as a kid, but I never really...”

“Really what?” Gon prompted, when Killua trailed off. “Never what?”

“I wasn't allowed, I guess. I still had to do the same things whether I was sick or not.”

“Oh,” Gon's face fell. “Your parents didn't tuck you up in bed with tea and soup?”

“God no.”

“I'm sorry.”

Gon snuggled in a little closer, slipping his arm around Killua's waist, and after a moment Killua relaxed, taking another sip from his mug.

“Chicken soup is supposed to make everything better,” Gon explained. “Alluka has gone to get some lemons and honey, they help too.”

“On her own?”

“Relax, she has her phone and it's just down the road. She insisted.”

“I'm sorry I'm such a mess.”

“What are you talking about?” Gon asked, his eyebrows knitting together. “You're not a mess, you're sick.”

“Look at me. I'm gross, and I'm kind of cranky too.”

“You're as cute as ever,” Gon grinned, kissing Killua's cheek lightly. “You're allowed to be a little cranky, everyone gets impatient when they aren't well. Really, Killua, it's okay.”

“You're too good to me.”

“Shut up,” Gon laughed. “Come here.”

He shuffled things around a little until he was leaning on the pillows with Killua in his lap, winding his arms around Killua's waist and pulling him in close. After a moment of embarrassment Killua leaned into him, closing his eyes as he relaxed, then taking another sip from his mug. 

“Really though,” he said softly, cracking one eye open to look back. “You're too good to me.”

“It's kind of nice knowing you have a vulnerable side after all, even if it's buried down deep.”

“Shut up.”

When he finished his soup and set the mug aside Gon pulled Killua's shirt over his head, casting aside the sweaty, sticky cotton. Slowly he rubbed at Killua's shoulder blades, his thumbs moving in tiny little circles over the tight spots. For all the aching his body had been doing in the past few hours, Gon's hands felt like heaven. He caressed every sore muscle, leaving kisses behind as his hands moved on, and Killua found himself going floppy. His head sank forward, his eyes fell closed, and for once he didn't care about the little smirk on Gon's face behind him. 

“Gon?”

“Hmm?” Gon hummed, pressing another little kiss to the back of Killua's neck. “What is it?”

“Thank you.”

“You need to stop thanking me. You make me feel like I'm not your friend.”

“You're not though, you're my boyfriend. It's different.”

“I'm not your friend too?”

“Well, yeah, I guess, but I like you more as a boyfriend than as a friend.”

“Either way, you don't need to thank me for looking after you when you're sick. That's my job, okay? Boyfriends look after each other.”

“Even when they're gross?”

“Even when they're gross,” Gon confirmed with a smile. “Especially when they're gross. That's how you know it's real, they care enough to stick around and be sweet when you're grumpy and gross.”

“I would kiss you right now if I weren't afraid of getting you sick.”

“There'll be plenty of time for kissing, right now you need to relax.”

It didn't take long before Gon felt Killua go limp in his arms, breathing slow, measured breaths through his lips, and he smiled as he settled himself around the slumbering form. 

“You're my boyfriend, Killua,” he whispered into soft, silver hair. “I'll never let you go.”

///


	3. You're x Too x Cute

When Killua woke up again Gon had slipped out from under him, somehow tucking him in to blankets and pillows without waking him. He yawned and rubbed at his eyes, a little grunt escaping him as he tried to sit up, and immediately Gon was nudging him back again.

“Hold it, mister,” he smiled, grabbing Killua and pulling him in close. “Stay put.”

“I thought you'd left.”

“Don't be silly. I had to move when my legs fell asleep, but I was never going to leave you.”

Killua smiled slightly when Gon's fingers tangled in his hair again. It was getting to a point where he almost felt incomplete when they weren't there. He leaned into Gon's side again, sighing fondly, and Gon couldn't keep the smile off his face. 

“You're too damn cute,” he mumbled, squeezing Killua a little tighter. “I can't begin to explain or even comprehend how cute you are.”

“You're the one sitting in bed with me all day because I have a cold.”

“You think I need an excuse to stay in bed with you all day?”

Killua looked up when he heard a knock on the door, smiling when Alluka nudged her way in with two mugs in hand.

“How are you feeling, Onii-chan? Any better?”

“Sleep is helping, I think.”

“I'm glad. Here, have some tea, it'll help too.”

“Thanks Alluka. Don't let me breathe on you though, I don't want to get you sick too.”

“I appreciate the concern,” she smiled softly. “But you just focus on getting better, don't worry about me. I can look after myself.”

“Make sure you tell us if you're going out or anything,” Gon reminded her, before Killua had a chance. “Wake me up if you need to, I'm not sick.”

“You don't need to worry about me.”

“You're a girl though, people pick on girls a lot.”

“Please, I'm a lady. I know which fork to use for salad and I know where to stick it if you cause trouble.”

Gon burst out laughing at the words, and Killua smiled fondly at him. His laugh was so bright and cheerful, Killua couldn't quite believe it. All he knew was it never failed to make him smile too.

“I think I'll be here anyway,” Alluka added with a smile. “So it's okay. Call me if you need anything, okay?”

“We will. Thanks Alluka.”

Killua pulled a face when he took a sip of the tea and Gon laughed at him, ruffling his hair playfully.

“I know it's not great, but it works.”

“Alright, alright. If you say so.”

He screwed up his face and took another long gulp, draining the mug as quickly as he could, while Gon sipped happily at his own.

“You can drink more water if you want to get rid of the taste,” Gon suggested. “Water is good too.”

“Alright, alright.”

He took a few gulps from the water bottle as well, wrinkling his nose as he set it down and looked at Gon again.

“There, I've been good. Do I get more attention now?”

“You're clingy when you're sick,” Gon teased, pulling the boy into his side lightly. “You should get sick more often.”

“I'm always clingy, I just have more excuses for it when I'm sick.”

“You don't need excuses.”

“I should probably get up soon though, I can't waste the whole day in bed.”

“You can and you will. You need rest. Stay here and quit complaining, I'm not letting go and I'm not letting you leave.”

"Is this a relationship or a hostage situation?"

“Both.”

They shared a quick little grin and Killua settled in obediently, dropping his head to Gon's shoulder.

“You still like me, right?”

“Obviously,” Gon chuckled, kissing his forehead. “Would I be here if I didn't?”

“Maybe. If you felt guilty.”

“I don't. I want to be with you. Forever.”

“I wasn't sure yesterday.”

“What did I do yesterday?”

“Nothing.”

Gon frowned slightly, and Killua closed his eyes as he shrugged.

“You were preoccupied with the cat.”

“Are you jealous of a cat now?”

“I wouldn't say jealous.”

“What would you call it?”

Killua hesitated, then shrugged.

“Cautious? Concerned?”

“Yeah right,” Gon scoffed. “You were totally jealous because I was cuddling a cat. A cat who spent all night sleeping on you, anyway.”

“I didn't ask it to sleep on me.”

“I didn't ask it to show up and hang out with us all afternoon. If you want cuddles you can have cuddles, any time you want. I'll set down a thousand cats if you say the word.”

“Really?”

“Really. You're far better to cuddle than any animal.”

Killua couldn't help but smile, softening a little as he looked up at Gon's painfully sincere face.

“Okay,” he conceded. “Next time I'll ask.”

“Good. Are you ready to sleep again?”

“No, I kind of just want to stay here. Is that okay?”

“I'll stay here with you for a year if that's what you want.”

“That's okay, just a couple of hours would be nice.”

“Deal.”

///

As the sky grew dark outside Killua finally hauled himself out of bed, sighing as Gon hovered over him nervously. With a fond little smile he turned around, shaking his head at the anxious look on Gon's face.

“I'm gonna take a shower, okay? I feel gross and sweaty. I'll be out soon.”

“Be careful. Don't slip and fall or anything.”

“I won't. I'll yell if I need you.”

“Okay. Enjoy, then.”

He grabbed a towel from the cupboard and shut himself in the little room, letting it quickly fill up with steam. It was relaxing being under the hot water, and he almost considered sitting down under the stream, but figured Gon wouldn't cope well when he found out – especially if Killua fell asleep in the water. Instead he cleaned himself off and stumbled his way out again, wrapping himself up in his fluffy towel. 

He hadn't brought clean clothes with him to the bathroom, so he made his way back to the bedroom, finding Gon and Alluka making the bed with clean sheets, the old ones tossed aside to be washed.

“Feeling any better, Onii-chan?”

“A little, yeah,” he agreed. “You guys don't have to baby me.”

“But this is the one time you won't beat me up for it,” Gon laughed, “I've gotta make the most of it.”

Despite himself Killua couldn't resist a smile, especially when Gon's arms wound around his neck for a hug. He had to grab at his towel with one hand, but the other went to Gon's back, and he felt his heart pound a little faster in his chest.

“Are you going back to bed or getting up for food?”

“Are those my only two choices?”

“Yup.”

“Food then, I guess.”

“Good choice. Maybe put some pants on first.”

“I will as soon as you leave the room.”

“Okay,” Gon grinned, kissing his cheek lightly. “It's good to see you awake.”

“Yeah. Sorry.”

“Don't be.”

The two of them left him alone to get dressed, and for a moment he leaned on the windowsill, breathing in ice cold air. The window was open just a crack, just enough to let in some fresh air, and right now he relished the feel of it.

When he started to shiver he tore himself away, finding a pair of old shorts and a baggy t-shirt for some kind of decency, then headed out to the kitchen where his boyfriend and sister were both waiting.

There was a feast waiting on the counter, with bowls full of mashed potatoes, steaming soup, and a mountain of plain rice. He was starting to think being sick was an art form.

“What do you want to try? Is anything especially appealing?” Alluka asked, with a plate in hand.

“Just a bit of everything would be good.”

“Done!”

She dished him out a spoonful from each bowl and a little mug of soup, and he smiled at her as he fell into a dining chair.

“Sorry I'm such a pain, you shouldn't be taking care of me.”

“You always take care of us, Onii-chan, it's my turn for once.”

“Want me to feed you?” Gon grinned, leaning his elbows on the table to look Killua in the eye. “I don't mind, I'll do it.”

“I can feed myself,” Killua grumbled, taking a spoonful of potato pointedly. “You don't have to hover over me.”

“You're cute though, I like to look.”

“Why do you compliment me more when I'm sick?”

“Because you're not happy,” Gon frowned slightly, confused. “You keep saying you feel gross and cranky, so I want to make you smile.”

“Ugh,” Killua dropped his head to the table, his face burning red. “You're too cute.”

Gon reached out to ruffle Killua's damp hair, smiling at him when he finally looked up again.

“I'll stop being a pain when you feel better, I promise.”

“You're not a pain.”

Killua went back to eating with his face still bright red, and after a moment Gon disappeared down the hall. When he returned he threw something over Killua's head, and Killua started a little.

“Hold still, keep eating.”

Killua looked up to see a towel in Gon's hands, taking a moment to catch on before he turned his awkward face back to his plate. With all the tenderness in the world Gon rubbed at Killua's damp hair, humming to himself quietly as he worked.

“Really though,” Killua mumbled between mouthfuls, “you're really sweet.”

“Doing my best.”

“If you were the one sick I would have just told you to suck it up and come for a run with me.”

“Well now you know better for next time. Lots of water and lots of sleep is the best cure.”

“Alluka can handle all the thoughtful stuff, right?” Killua asked with a tiny smile, glancing over at her. “I'll just hang out in bed with you.”

“That sounds good too. I'm not as stubborn as you, I won't be fighting to go out and find work when I'm feeling miserable.”

“We should meditate for a bit after food,” Killua suggested, changing the topic quickly. “Work on some aura control.”

“Sure, if you're feeling up to it.”

“Yeah, it might help me relax a bit.”

The training was mostly for Gon's benefit and they both knew it, but Killua found it relaxing – even enjoyable – to sit on the bed with him and meditate. It was peaceful and quiet, and Killua felt like somehow the experience made them feel closer.

“Did you want some more food first?”

“A bit more rice would be good.”

“I'll get it,” Alluka interjected quickly, “you two stay put.”

Killua smiled slightly up at Gon and got a grin in return, along with a little kiss on his much-dryer-now hair. 

///


	4. Questionable x Decisions

Killua cracked an eye open to look at Gon beside him, watching the peace and concentration that fell over his body, the softness to his taut muscles and strong limbs. It didn't take long for Gon to feel him staring, and he raised his head to look over, smiling when he found Killua's contented expression waiting for him.

“I'm glad you asked me to come with you,” Gon said softly. “I know it's only been a week, but I'm really happy.”

“Me too,” Killua assured him. “I would kiss you if I wasn't sick.”

“You owe me a few now, I think.”

“Yeah. There'll be plenty the moment I'm better.”

“I look forward to it. Is there anything I can do right now? Food? Water?”

“Would you rub my back again like you did before?”

“Gladly.”

He wriggled over on the blankets to seat himself between Gon's legs, letting Gon position him just right. His head hung forward as he started to relax, Gon's hands making slow, smooth motions across his aching muscles, and a sigh came from his lips of its own accord.

“I might fall asleep,” Killua warned him. “Sorry if I do.”

“You're most welcome to fall asleep. It didn't seem like you were sleeping well lately.”

“You noticed?”

“Yeah, of course. I thought maybe I was being too clingy and making you hot and stuff, so I tried to give you more space, but I always woke up closer than I started.”

“Idiot,” Killua mumbled. 

“What? Why this time?”

“You're the only reason I sleep at all. I thought I'd done something wrong when you moved away.”

“No! I'm sorry! You didn't do anything!”

“You were so busy playing with the cat, I thought you'd found something else to cuddle and moved on from me.”

“That better have been a joke. Kiki went home, she lives a few houses down. Besides, she slept on you all night.”

“You've already used that excuse once, you can't use it again.”

“Then stop being silly. I want to be with you, Killua. I'll never let you go, not as long as I can help it.”

“Sounds good to me.”

With a little yawn Killua fell back against Gon's chest, letting his eyes sink closed as he nestled his head in the crook of Gon's neck.

“I think I'm ready for another nap,” he admitted. “Will you stay with me?”

“Obviously. Here or do you want to lie down?”

Killua hummed a little as he thought about it, and Gon smiled fondly at him.

“Maybe lie down. I'm comfy but I'm not sure I could sleep peacefully.”

“Okay, come here then.”

He slid an arm around Killua's waist and navigated them under the blankets, keeping him tucked in tight as he lay down and took Killua's tired body with him.

“Still comfy?”

“I think so.” He wiggled a little, then nodded. “Uh huh.”

“Okay.”

Gon kept one arm around his waist, keeping their bodies close, but the other he navigated to silver hair, running his fingers through it lightly like he did on night one. 

“Gon?”

“Mm-hm?”

“I'm really glad you're here. I like you a lot.”

“I like you too. Go to sleep.”

///

Killua was sweltering when he woke up. His entire body was burning, and he wanted nothing more than to tear off all the blankets on the bed. When he saw the white streaks on the window the idea hit him, and he slid out of Gon's grasp, tiptoeing his way to the front door silently. He didn't want to wake the others, he just wanted to cool off for a minute.

The snow felt good against his skin, insanely good. There was a fresh fall scattered over the ground, and he picked up a handful of it, holding it between his hands and patting it against his face. It was pretty firm, he could probably walk across it. Sit on it. Yeah, that sounded good. He would sit in the snow for a minute to cool down, then go back to bed with Gon.

He closed his eyes for a moment to savour the cool breeze and icy droplets, breathing a sigh of relief as he began to cool down.

“Killua!” 

The voice was urgent, insistent, and he pulled a face as a hand shook his shoulder roughly.

“Killua, can you hear me?”

He tried to grumble an answer but his lips wouldn't co-operate, so he settled for opening his eyes to glare at him.

“Oh thank God. Killua you idiot, come here.”

Strong arms scooped him up and carried him inside despite his protests, and suddenly Gon was stripping him off in the middle of the living room.

“Bring me blankets,” Gon said over his shoulder. “All of them. Please.”

There was fabric around his body again now, but not clothing. He was stark naked underneath the blanket, but he couldn't seem to find the words to ask as Gon pulled him in tight, hugging him around the waist. 

Alluka returned within moments and the two of them started shrouding Killua in blankets, tucking them around his stomach and chest first, then moving out toward his arms and legs. 

He didn't feel cold, but the pair were frantic, so he didn't bother to argue.

“Why were you sitting outside?” Gon asked desperately, hugging him a little tighter. “How long were you out there?”

“Not long,” he mumbled. “A few minutes.”

“Killua,” Gon protested, his voice pained. “I waited half an hour thinking you were in the bathroom, before I went looking for you. Did you fall asleep?”

“I don't think so.”

“How else do you explain it?”

“I was hot,” he mumbled, shrugging. “I wanted to cool down.”

“Wake me up next time, okay? I'll come with you if you're that determined.”

“You were asleep, I didn't want to disturb you.”

“I would much rather that you disturbed me. Okay?”

“Alright.”

Killua started to shiver, all of a sudden realising how cold he felt out of nowhere, and Gon sighed as he planted a kiss on Killua's neck.

“You scare me sometimes. Come on, let's put you back in bed.”

Still bundled in blankets, Killua found himself scooped up again, carried down the hall to the bedroom. They arrived to find Alluka putting hot water bottles in the blankets, and Killua didn't bother to argue as Gon tucked him in and piled extra blankets over top.

“Don't move. I'm watching you.”

“Why are you all the way over there?”

“You need to warm up and stay put.”

“Isn't that easier if you're here with me?”

Gon sighed, but climbed in bed obediently, careful to keep his hands up above Killua's waist as they curled up together. 

“Can you take your shirt off?” Killua asked pitifully.

“If you want.”

He dragged it over his head and tossed it aside, letting Killua snuggle into his bare chest and watching him with a combination of adoration and concern.

“Are you warming up?”

“I am now.”

“Alright,” Gon sighed, tucking himself in a little tighter. “Promise you'll wake me next time you have a brilliant idea?”

“Promise.”

“Pinky promise?”

“Uh-huh, but I shouldn't kiss you.”

Gon planted a big smooch on Killua's cheek, smiling softly.

“There, now it's a promise.”

“Goodnight, Gon. Sorry I made you worry.”

“I'm just glad you're okay.”

///


	5. Long x Awaited

When Killua woke up he could tell that Gon was already awake. He did his best not to move, not to disturb their peace. He wasn't ready to move yet, wasn't ready to lift his head from Gon's shoulder and force a smile as they parted. Wasn't ready to feel Gon's hand stop stroking his hair, or feel the sudden cold as Gon's arm left his waist and back. As long as Gon still thought he was asleep, he could stay in the same moment of peace and comfort, before reality set in.

Gon's senses were too sharp, though. He knew.

Killua felt a finger poke at the corner of his lips, turning them up toward a smile, and he cracked one eye open to look. Gon's face was grinning down at him, and he couldn't help but smile back.

“You want to stay?”

“Mm.”

“Okay.”

He closed his eye again immediately and nestled in to Gon's warmth, the smile still on his face. Gon's fingers returned to stroking lightly at his hair, and Killua practically purred under his touch.

“Just say so, next time,” Gon murmured, as he dropped a kiss on Killua's head. “Otherwise I think something is wrong.”

“I will.”

“Are you feeling any better?”

“Yeah.”

“A lot better?”

“Yeah.” 

Killua yawned, freeing one hand from between the two of them to rub at his eyes, finally opening them to look up at Gon's gorgeous smile. 

“Still tired,” he elaborated, “but other than that I feel pretty good.”

“That was quick.”

“I told you I don't get sick.”

There was a creaking from the door and Gon moved slightly to look, but Killua didn't bother. He would take his chances at something somehow managing to sneak up on them. It was worth it to stay put a little longer.

“Oh, good morning,” Gon's voice raised an octave, almost baby talking. “How are you?”

Killua finally looked back, his curiosity getting the better of him, and groaned when he saw the little blur of white jump over him. It was purring already, trying to nudge and knead its way in between them, but Killua held on stubbornly.

“Oi,” he pouted, “he's mine, move it.”

“Are you sure you're feeling better?” Gon teased, gently pushing messy hair back to feel Killua's forehead. “You're arguing with a cat.”

“I'm fine.”

“Stop telling me you're fine. It doesn't mean anything anymore.”

“It does.”

“It means you're being stubborn.”

“I'm sick, cut me some slack.”

“Oh so _now_ you're sick?”

“Shut up.” Killua thumped a fist on Gon's chest indignantly. “Let me sleep.”

“Alright, alright. Come here Kiki.”

He made kissy noises at the cat until it finally gave in, crawling over to the other side of the bed to curl up against his back. Killua gave him what he hoped was an apologetic look, and Gon only smiled, planting a kiss on Killua's cheek.

“It's okay, I kind of like seeing you get possessive. Even if it is over a cat.”

“I'm tired.”

“I know. It's okay, you go back to sleep, I'll stay here with you.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

He curled back into his comfortable spot, sighing as he closed his eyes again. 

It had taken them a while to work out the whole sharing-a-bed thing. The first night had been a mess of elbows and knees and cutting off airways. They'd had to experiment a lot with ways to fit around each other.

Spooning had worked, but left one of them feeling clingy – the little spoon didn't have enough freedom to nestle in when they were facing away.

Back to back had worked, but they had both agreed that it felt too distant.

Over the course of a few nights, though, they'd finally gotten it down to a science. 

Killua tended to sleep pretty well sprawled on his back, which gave Gon the perfect postion to intertwine their legs, keeping them close enough to make contact elsewhere.

Despite being taller (which he would never, ever let go.) Killua had found himself more comfortable sleeping a little lower in the bed, where he could jam his face into Gon's shoulder or chest. Gon, in turn, had taken to using Killua's head almost like a pillow, his cheek resting on soft silver hair. 

And with that they had developed their routines. They had found the right spot to start in each night, for them both to fall asleep comfortably. Undoubtedly at some point in the night Killua would wake from a bad dream and would roll himself over, tangling his fingers in Gon's shirt to hold himself close. Gon's free hand would wind around his waist when he did, pulling him in to comfort him, and the arm under his head would unfailingly shift a little to reach Killua's hair. 

Neither of them ever said a word about the way they moved so predictably in the night. It worked, that was what mattered. 

Sharing a small bed with another person was an art form, but it was an art the pair had well and truly mastered.

Killua was awake now, though. And as much as he liked remaining curled up in his comfort spot, he knew he wasn't going to be getting any more sleep that morning. Gon knew, too, although true to form he didn't say a word. 

“What did you dream about?” Killua asked quietly, without opening his eyes. “Anything interesting today?”

“Mm... We were at the beach,” Gon yawned. “Alluka was looking for pretty shells.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, but there was this big crab who wanted all the shells for himself, and he got mad at us for wanting to take them. He said they were all his shells and we had to buy them from him if we wanted to keep them.”

“So did we buy the shells?”

“No, you told him he was an idiot and punched him in the eye. Turned out he was kind of a jerk, all the fish told us so.”

“Serves him right for trying to take Alluka's shells.”

“What about you? What did you dream about?”

They both froze, Gon quickly realising his mistake. The words had slipped out without thinking, and surprised the both of them.

“Sorry,” he mumbled quickly. “I don't know why I asked.”

“It's okay.”

“You don't need to tell me.”

“I know.”

They fell silent again, both of them nuzzling in a little closer, and Killua found himself chewing at his lower lip.

“We were walking through a crowd,” he began quietly, his voice barely a whisper. “When I turned around you were gone, so I dragged Alluka off to one side to look for you.”

“Mm-hm,” Gon murmured his acknowledgement, stroking at Killua's hair again.

“I let go of her hand for a moment and then she was gone too, taken away by a dark hand that I only saw out the corner of my eye.”

Gon made another encouraging noise, but refrained from interrupting.

“I was running around looking, screaming your names, yelling for people to help, to look, asking if anyone saw what happened. No one listened though, it was like I wasn't even there. A ghost.”

He paused for a moment, then sighed again.

“That was about it. I don't remember the rest.”

_Liar, liar, liar._

His own voice chanted at him in his head, but he did his best to shut it out, instead relishing the way Gon hummed sympathetically as he squeezed him a little tighter.

“I'm right here,” Gon reminded him. “I always will be.”

“I know. I would follow you to the ends of the earth if that was what it took to keep you.”

“Likewise.” He paused for a moment, his hand slowing to a stop. “Do you really not feel sick anymore? Honestly?”

“Except for being tired, like I said.”

“Okay. Look at me?”

Killua tilted his head back obediently, meeting Gon's shining eyes and soft smile, and immediately Gon's lips were on his. He froze for a moment, then softened into a little smile of his own, returning the gesture with equal vigour. 

“Don't get sick ever again,” Gon told him sternly, “I've missed kissing you.”

“Whatever you say, Sir.”

///


	6. Turn x of x Events

Killua felt a lurch in his stomach and froze, one hand roaming to touch it gently. Another lurch and he found his feet, stumbling his way down the hall to the bathroom.

“Killua?” Gon called after him, “are you okay?”

He couldn't find words to answer, instead kicking the door closed and dropping to his knees, his knuckles white as he clutched at the sides of the porcelain bowl. He could hear footsteps following him but couldn't stop it from coming, opening his mouth on a torrent of sour liquid. 

“Oh Killua,” Gon said softly, kneeling to rub his back lightly. “Not feeling so good after all, huh?”

“Don't watch.”

“It's okay, I'm not looking.”

As promised, he kept his eyes averted when Killua leaned into the bowl again, coughing and spluttering as everything he'd eaten came back up in one violent retch.

“I'm sorry,” Killua choked out, with two kinds of tears in his eyes. “I thought I was okay.”

“Shh, I know, it's alright. Relax, let your body do what it needs to do.”

“I probably got you-” His words were cut off in a hurry by another shudder through his body, and it took him a moment to recover. “I probably got you sick. When I kissed you.”

“I kissed you first,” Gon reminded him. “It doesn't matter. You'll be better by the time I get sick, you can take care of me next time.”

“I'm sorry.”

“It's okay, I'm not upset. I'm not mad. Seriously, just try to relax. It hurts more if you're tense.”

A choked little sob escaped Killua and Gon's heart shattered, his face falling almost beyond recognition. He leaned in to rest his forehead on Killua's back, still gently petting him with one hand.

“Please don't be upset,” Gon begged. “I know it sucks and I know you feel awful but I can't handle it if you start... If you start...”

He paused for a moment, then lowered his voice to the tiniest whisper he could manage.

“Crying.”

Killua didn't even attempt to protest, didn't attempt to deny it, just huddled, shaking, over the bowl with tears pouring from his eyes. Gon continued his attempts at comfort, even though he suspected they were futile, putting every ounce of love he could possibly muster into the hands that stroked his hair and rubbed his back. 

“I know,” he whispered, “I know, baby.”

It took a long while for Killua to be stable again, for him to stop shaking and retching, to sit back on his heels limply.

“All done?”

Killua just nodded, and Gon kissed the top of his head lightly as he stood up.

“Okay, stay there a moment.”

He fetched a glass first, filling it with water so Killua could rinse the taste out of his mouth, then did a quick clean up while Killua re-learned how to breathe. He flushed the toilet, wiped everything down with disinfectant, then helped Killua to his feet to wash his hands. He reached for his toothbrush while he was at the basin and Gon smiled, keeping an arm around his waist to take some of his weight as Killua cleaned his mouth out.

The moment he was finished, as he started to take his first unsteady step toward the doorway, Gon scooped Killua into his arms. It didn't take a lot of effort – Gon was strong anyway, and Killua had lost weight the past few days – and Killua didn't bother to protest, letting himself be tucked into bed again.

“Can you drink something for me?” Gon requested softly. “Water? Tea?”

“Ugh.”

“Just something, so you won't get too dehydrated.”

He fumbled for the water bottle on the nightstand, taking a few tentative sips and grumbling all the way through.

“What would you prefer?” Gon asked, as Killua set the bottle back down again. “I'll go get it.”

“Milkshake.”

“Probably not a great idea if you've been vomitting,” Gon smiled apologetically. “When you're better, okay? Anything else?”

“Soda.”

“Yeah? What kind?”

“Orange.”

“Okay, I'll go get some. You rest, call Alluka if you need anything.”

Killua rolled over and buried his face in the pillow as Gon left, ashamed of the stupid tears that he lost control of. He let the pillowcase soak up the remnants, to hopefully wipe away the tracks, and took a long, shuddering breath.

It felt like Gon was away for an eternity, when really it could only have been ten minutes, but when he returned he had a big bottle of orange liquid and a straw in his clutches.

“Okay, sit up for me would you?”

“Don't wanna.”

“Please, Killua.”

“Don't look.”

“Okay, fine,” Gon humored him, turning his back. “I'm not looking.”

He knew his eyes were still red and swollen, his cheeks still stained with tears, and he wasn't ready to see the look of pity on Gon's face that it would induce. He accepted the bottle from Gon's hand, poked the straw into his mouth, and took a few tentative sips.

Gon had done well, he had to admit. It was amazing how quickly he forgot the taste of bile in favour of soda. He didn't want to drink too much and upset his stomach, but he far outdid the two-sips-at-a-time he'd been stuck on with water.

“Better?”

“Yeah,” Killua said faintly. “It's good.”

“There's a bucket just beside you, in case you end up needing it. You know, if you can't make it or whatever. Do you want me to stay with you?”

“If you're not busy.”

“I'm never too busy for you. Can I look at you now?”

“I'd rather you didn't.”

“Okay, spooning it is then.”

Killua actually managed a smile as Gon edged his way around the bed carefully, keeping his back to Killua the whole time. It wasn't until he was in the blankets, tucking his arm around Killua's waist with the gentlest of touches, that he relaxed a little. Killua nudged himself in a little tighter, pressing his back into Gon's tight chest and abs, and let his hand fall over the top of Gon's against his stomach. 

“You're the best,” Killua mumbled. “I'm glad you're with me, even though it sucks for you.”

“It really doesn't. I know you don't believe me, but I swear it's the truth.”

“You must be bored out of your mind.”

“Killua,” Gon said softly, leaning in to kiss his neck lightly. “When I was back home, I spent every waking minute thinking about you. Where you were, what you were doing, whether you were okay or not. Being here while you're sick and being able to help you, even if it's only a little bit, is so much better to me than sitting at the other end of the world with no idea you're sick. Okay? So please don't feel bad for me, it makes me really, really happy to look after you.”

“Just tell me when you've had enough, okay? I won't be offended, I'll let you have some time for yourself.”

“I promise,” Gon chuckled, “if that day comes, I will tell you.”

“Okay. Um, can you close your eyes?”

“Sure.”

When he knew the eyes were safely closed he rolled over, finding his private little spot to cuddle in and hide his face in Gon's chest. 

“Okay, I'm done,” he mumbled. “You can open them if you want.”

“Okay. Hey, Killua?”

“Mm?”

“You know you're super handsome, right?”

“What are you talking about?” Killua grumbled, blushing. 

“Like, I know you've been kind of miserable, and that's made me sad, but it's kind of unfair how gorgeous you are even when you're sick.”

“Quit it.”

“You're super cute when you're flushed, and you're really handsome when you're pale, and when you're exhausted your hair gets all messy – like, more than usual, because you run your hands through it or lean on stuff a lot – and that's really cute too, and when you cry – I know, I know, you don't cry – it makes your eyes all shiny and pretty. So it's kind of unfair that you're so gorgeous when you're not sick, and that it doesn't get any less when you're unwell.”

Killua couldn't find a single word of response, just burning red and shaking a little with nerves, and Gon laughed as he hugged Killua a little tighter and littered more little kisses across his neck and jaw.

“I really, really like you, Killua. If you hadn't guessed. I think you're perfect.”

“Even though I get sick?”

“Yeah, I'm okay with you not being invincible.”

“And even though I get mad or say dumb stuff?”

“You're talking to the King of saying dumb stuff.”

“And even though I can't offer you all the things you deserve?”

“Like what?”

“Emotional stability. Someone sympathetic. Someone who can take you wherever you want without any other responsibilities. Someone... Someone who had a normal childhood, someone normal.”

“Those things are over-rated,” Gon shrugged. “You're more than I ever could have asked for.”

“I'll keep trying.”

“I know. Me too.”

Killua sighed again into Gon's chest, finally letting his tired eyes sink closed. 

“Why do you always wear a shirt to bed?” he mumbled, his face still burning.

“Because you hold on to it during the night.”

“What?”

“When you get upset,” Gon explained, without a hint of teasing in his tone. “You use it to hold on to me, to keep yourself close. So I wear one to give you something to hold.”

“Idiot,” Killua mumbled, strangely embarrassed. 

“Want me to take it off?”

“Yeah.”

He peeled it over his head obediently, casting it aside, and Killua relished the feel of his cold cheek against Gon's warm skin.

“Better?”

“Better.”

Gon's arm was around him, keeping him close, and tentatively he reached his own around Gon, his hands almost meeting on the other side. It served just as well for keeping him close – maybe better – and he was pretty sure he liked this better.

“Go to sleep, baby,” Gon whispered into his hair. “Get some rest.”

///


	7. On x The x Mend

“We've been having fun, Mito-san,” Gon assured her with a smile. “Killua has had the flu, so we've been hanging around indoors, the snow hasn't really affected us yet. We're gonna go sledding as soon as he's better, though.”

Killua leaned into his side as he spoke, smiling when the arm wound around his waist. 

“Uh-huh. We haven't gotten in a single fight since I left the island, everything is really peaceful, I swear. You don't need to be worried about us.”

Had he not told Gon about the fights? Maybe he was just putting on an act for Mito, but he seemed pretty genuine. Was he a better liar than Killua thought, or had Killua just forgotten to tell him about his run-ins in the city? Either one was possible.

“Okay, Mito-san, thanks for calling. I hope you have a good night!”

With a smile he hung up and put the phone aside, snuggling into Killua happily. 

“No more nausea?”

“None.”

“Still feel bad?”

“No.”

“Sniffles? Coughing? Sleepy?”

“No.”

“I'm glad. Maybe your body was just purging the last little bits then. Or maybe my kiss was bad.”

“Shut up.”

Gon laughed and lay back, dragging Killua's head onto his chest to stroke his hair again. Killua didn't protest at being pulled around, just smiled faintly and closed his eyes, listening to Gon's heart beat steadily under his cheek. 

“It's weird seeing you go so long without coming back covered in blood.”

“I know,” Killua smiled slightly, but didn't bother to open his eyes. “I feel so weirdly clean.”

“You look good in red.”

“You think?”

“You look good in most things.”

“I should have seen that coming,” Killua chuckled to himself. “Thank you.”

“What do you want to do if you're still feeling good tomorrow?”

“You just told Mito we were going sledding.”

“I mean, Alluka wants to, I assumed you would come along.”

“Don't get me wrong, I'm fine with sledding.”

Gon smiled, brushing Killua's hair back from his face lightly to see him better.

“Have you been before?”

“Nope, but it can't be that hard.”

“It's not hard, it's fun.”

“Sounds good to me. We should have a snowball fight too.”

“Not when you're still recovering, we'll get too caught up in it and you'll tire yourself out.”

“Ugh, you're no fun.”

“Don't make me push you off the bed.”

“Do it, I dare you.”

Gon pulled a face, and Killua smirked.

“Yeah, thought so.”

“Fine, I'll just have to...” he trailed off, thinking, then a smile slowly crossed his lips.

“To?” Killua prompted.

Gon grinned as he dropped his hands to Killua's sides, poking at him lightly and making him squirm. He swept his hands under Killua's shirt to scratch at him and Killua dissolved into a fit of forceful giggles. 

When he tried to roll away Gon grabbed him, swinging a leg across his body to pin him in place, laughing to himself as Killua squirmed and struggled beneath him.

“Gon, stop!” Killua insisted through his laughter. “Enough! Come on!”

“Take it back.”

“Take what back?!”

“You know what you said.”

“I don't remember! Gon! I'm gonna pee!”

“Admit that I'm fun.”

“What?!”

“You said I'm no fun. Take it back.”

“Okay, okay! You're fun, Gon! I'm sorry! I take it back, you're the most fun person I know!”

With a grin Gon ceased his tickles, leaning down to kiss Killua lightly before he sat up again. Killua pouted as they parted, practically begging for more, but Gon refused.

“Come on,” Gon said firmly, standing up off the bed. “Up you get.”

“Whyy?” Killua whined, draping one arm across his eyes. “I was comfy.”

Gon picked him up with a strength Killua still wasn't used to, amused by the splutters and half-baked protests as he threw Killua over his shoulder lightly.

“Help! Alluka! I'm being kidnapped!”

“Shut up,” Gon laughed, “he's fine, Alluka, don't worry.”

“Where are you taking me?”

“You said you had to pee.”

“I can walk myself to the bathroom!”

“This seemed like more fun.”

He bent over and dumped Killua in a heap on the tiles, grinning when he got another sulky little pout in return. 

“Go pee, then you can have more cuddles.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

///


	8. Snow x Day

Killua smiled fondly as Gon fussed over him, letting him fasten zips and buttons to his heart's content, holding his arms out obediently for Gon to slip gloves over his hands.

“Okay,” Gon stood up and looked him over, nodding firmly. “I think we're good.”

“You sure?” Killua teased. “My face is still exposed.”

“Yeah, you're too cute to cover up fully,” Gon grinned back, planting a kiss on the tip of Killua's nose. “You'll just have to cope.”

Despite his words, as they reached the door he wound a bright blue scarf around Killua's neck, tucking it up over his mouth and nose, and forced a knitted woolen hat over Killua's mop of hair. It had a little pompom on the top that Killua could feel bobble when he turned his head quickly, and Gon seemed incredibly pleased by the sight.

“Perfect,” he grinned. “Let's go sledding.”

Killua felt like a robot as he walked, like one of the toys from his chocolate boxes. His arms and legs were stiff, couldn't bend properly, and he had to walk in a strange manner to stay upright. Gon gripped at his hand tightly, dragging a sled in the other hand, and as they began to ascend the hill Killua saw Alluka at the top waving, with another sled in hand. 

“Sorry we took so long!” Gon called up to her, “had to make sure Killua was warm enough!”

The landscape around them was solid white, the greenery destroyed by the cold, the branches drowned in snow. Even the little house they were renting had been coated in the stuff, the roof gone from the deep red of when they arrived to pure white. It was strangely beautiful, in a way.

When they reached the top of the hill Gon stopped to smile at Killua for a moment, a strange look of fondness in his eyes.

“You look good here,” he said after a moment, tugging at a lock of Killua's hair. “You fit in.”

“You need to stop saying stuff like that,” Killua grumbled. “At least in public.”

Gon just smiled at him, and Killua looked away with his cheeks flushed under the scarf.

“I prefer the contrast,” he mumbled. “I like seeing your colours stand out against the snow.”

“We make a good team,” he grinned, tugging down the edge of the scarf to kiss Killua's cheek, then patting it back into place. “Okay Alluka, you go first! I'll run down to the end to catch you!”

He ran off down the hill and Alluka got her sled into place, settling herself on the platform. Killua bent over as she grapsed the reins, smiling even though she couldn't see it.

“I'll push, say when.”

She waited for the thumbs up from Gon, then nodded.

“Okay, go!”

He pushed her forward, propelling her down the hill, watching her glee as she went flying down the snow. As she reached the bottom it began to slow off a little, and Gon stopped her before she got too close to the trees. 

“Your turn, Killua!” he called with a grin. “I'll catch you!”

Climbing on felt like it might be the dumbest idea he ever had, but still he found himself obeying. He settled himself on the seat, pulled his feet up, held the reins, and hopped himself forward.

Snow and ice sprayed him in the face as he shot down the mountain, and he squinted his eyes as he got closer to the bottom, struggling to see through it. He felt his pace start to slow, then Gon's hands catching him safely, and finally he let go to wipe his eyes.

“Fun, right?” Gon grinned, “I told you.”

“Yeah,” Killua smiled fondly, “it was fun.”

“Alluka is getting ready to go again, you go climb.”

“You have a turn, you shouldn't get stuck down here the whole time. We'll alternate.”

“Okay!”

Killua handed the sled off and got a kiss on the iced-over eye for his troubles, rubbing them one more time so he could peer up at Alluka at the top.

“Ready, Onii-chan?” she called.

He gave her a thumbs up and she grinned, walking herself forward a little then quickly pulling her feet up as she started to move. He could see her smile this time as she slid, her face lighting up, and he couldn't help but smile too as she flew toward him.

True to form the sled began to slow, and he stopped it for her to climb off.

“Thanks, Onii-chan!” she kissed his cheek lightly, her face flushed from the cold, but beaming all the same. “You learned fast!”

“Go on,” he chuckled, “Gon is about to come down, you start climbing.”

“Okay!”

He smiled as he shot a thumbs up to Gon at the top, readying himself to catch the boy he suspected would come with much more speed than Alluka. 

He had to admit, it was pretty fun.

///

The kitchen filled with steam as Alluka stirred a pot of milk on the stove, waiting for it to heat up so they could mix in the chocolate powder. Gon was a self-proclaimed expert at hot chocolate, apparently, so while they waited for the heat he carefully measured out the right ingredients for it.

“Did you have fun today, Onii-chan? You seemed much healthier today.”

“Yeah, I feel good, it was nice to be outdoors again.”

“Thanks for coming sledding with me!”

“It was my pleasure, thanks for inviting me.”

Gon took over when the milk began to bubble, while Killua and Alluka stood back to watch his intense concentration. As the powder began to dissolve and the milk began to darken, Gon shot a quick grin back at the pair.

“You guys go get comfy, I'll be there in two minutes!”

Killua knew better than to question him, so he nodded and led Alluka through to the living room, digging out cushions and thick blankets for them to bundle up in. Soon enough Gon was setting big mugs down on the table before them, full of hot chocolate and marshmallows and little squares of chocolate beginning to melt into the drink. 

He plonked himself down on the cushion beside Killua, stealing the closest end of the blanket to pull around his shoulders and snuggling into Killua's side.

Between Gon, the blankets, and the hot mug in his hands, Killua finally began to lose the chill of the snow, warmth seeping through him both physically and emotionally. 

It had been a long time since he'd been so happy.

“So what did you think of sledding?” Gon asked, leaning his head on Killua's shoulder. “Fun?”

“Yeah, but next time I think we should go snowboarding.”

“That sounds cool. Have you been before?”

“No, but it can't be that different to skateboarding, surely.”

“I guess we'll find out. I think we'll get colder doing that, we'll have to find a hot spring nearby for after. So we can soak and relax and warm up before we come back home.”

“Works for me.”

“I'll start looking into it tomorrow, then,” Gon promised. “Tonight I just want to do this.”

“This?”

“Cuddles and hot chocolate and just all talking and stuff together. The three of us don't talk enough.”

“That can be arranged.”

///


	9. Future x Plans

Killua was finally feeling back to normal when he woke up, sitting up to yawn and stretch and rub at his eyes. Immediately Gon was leaning on his back, grinning as he planted a kiss on Killua's cheek.

“Morning!” he said brightly, “you must be feeling good, huh?”

“Yeah, I do. All better I think.”

“Glad to hear it, I have a surprise.”

“Yeah?”

“I found you somewhere to go snowboarding.”

“No way. Already?”

“Uh-huh!”

“You're the best boyfriend ever.”

“Bring lots of warm clothes, we can rent all the gear on the mountain.”

Killua didn't have to drag himself out of bed for once, a spring finding its way into his step as he got ready to go out, bundling up in warm clothes and packing more of them into his backpack. Gon was waiting for him at the door when he headed out to lace his boots up, surprised to see Alluka on the couch with a book.

“Are you not coming?”

“Me? Snowboarding?” she laughed, “no, I'm gonna enjoy the peace and quiet. Don't worry, I'm gonna text you guys every hour to let you know everything is okay. If I hear anything or see anything I'll call you right away.”

“Alright, just be careful, okay?”

“Of course. Go have fun, Onii-chan. It's about time you got to do something for you.”

He hugged her goodbye quickly and followed Gon out the door, linking gloved hands with him as they started the trek through the snow.

///

Killua was buzzing with excitement as they sat on the chairlift and slowly made their way up the mountain. It had taken no time at all to get boards and goggles sorted out, then they'd spent a few minutes playing on the flat to get the hang of things before heading up the slope. He could feel the weight of the board hanging from his foot, and he kicked his feet lightly in his anticipation.

“Quit it,” Gon smiled fondly, elbowing him in the ribs. “You're shaking the lift.”

“Oh sorry, you mean like this?”

He began forcefully swinging the board around, grinning as Gon clutched at the bars on the side, his eyes wide.

“Killua!”

“Relax, this thing can take it. Try it, it's kinda fun.”

He wrapped an arm around Gon and held him tightly as he started shaking the chair again, and after a moment Gon conceded a smile.

“You're awful.”

“Try it.”

He began to swing his legs lightly, and before long they were both swinging back and forth, laughing like idiots both at their own actions and at how stupid each other was. Killua kept his arm around Gon the whole way up, hoping to give him a little extra balance and support as they played, until finally they were lifting the bar and sliding off. 

Gon stumbled a little as they started to move but Killua grabbed him once more, helping him get out of the way of the chairs as they came around.

“Thanks,” he smiled softly. “For helping.”

“Any time, you know that.”

Gon had, typically, managed to get hold of the one bright green board that was in the store. It perfectly matched everything else on his body – his waterproof pants, his puffy jacket, even the goggles he'd bought on their way in.  
Killua, on the other hand, had become a mess of colour. His pants were navy blue, his jacket was pure white (he was very careful about keeping it clean), his new goggles were a dark red, and his board was a mess of purple and orange. He would certainly stand out on the slopes, that was for sure. Not that the leprechaun next to him wouldn't. 

When they'd both strapped in their back feet and were ready at the top of the slope, Gon looked back and smiled again at Killua. He extended a hand and Killua waited for a poke or a pinch like usual, but instead Gon just patted the pompom on his woolen hat happily. Killua paused for a moment, his hand roaming up to brush at his hat himself, then a smile broke across his features.

“Come on, let's give this a go.”

///

By the time they gave up for the day it was getting dark out. Gon was exhausted and frozen solid, his body destroyed by countless falls and slides through the freshly fallen snow. Ice had even managed to get up his pants and his sleeves at some point, soaking the clothes underneath, but he had been having far too much fun to complain about it.

Killua, on the other hand, had picked it up pretty quickly. While it wasn't quite the same as riding a skateboard, it wasn't horrifically different either, and he'd figured out the differences pretty quickly. He'd spent the latter part of the day trying out the jumps scattered along their path, throwing spins in the air and laughing breathlessly every time he bailed out or hit the ground. 

Gon hadn't had quite the same confidence, although he'd attempted some little hops on the ground, but he'd very much enjoyed watching Killua having a blast.

As soon as they'd returned their gear, Gon made for the hot springs, dragging Killua by the sleeve. They fetched their bags from the lockers and headed into the hot, steamy shower rooms, letting out long sighs the moment they crossed the threshold.

“This is gonna be so good,” Gon exclaimed, tearing off his icy clothing. “Oh man I can't wait.”

“What did you do?” Killua asked, grabbing Gon's wrist. “What are these red marks from? Damn you're cold!”

“Just snow, it went up my jacket and stuff sometimes.”

“Are you an idiot? You should have told me, you should have come and changed.”

“It's fine, relax.”

The room was empty other than the two of them, most of the skiiers and boarders gone home for the night, so Killua kissed the bright red patches lightly.

“Idiot,” he repeated. “Come on, let's shower.”

He expected to feel apprehension about stripping off in front of Gon, expected to be embarrassed, but somehow it just wasn't there. Even completely nude, with everything on display – and after being out in the cold, to boot – he just didn't care. Gon seemed equally comfortable, and the two chatted about everything and nothing as they cleaned themselves off, shoving each other around playfully just like they did fully clothed.

“Here, let me,” Gon grinned when Killua reached for a shampoo bottle. “This is my chance to be cute and affectionate.”

“You're always cute,” Killua argued, but handed it over obediently. “Okay, fine.”

He sat back on his stool and relaxed, watching Gon's tongue poke out the corner of his mouth as he concentrated, then he let his eyes fall closed with a little smile.

“I'm glad we came,” he said softly. “It was really cool of you to find somewhere so quickly.”

“Alluka says you always do stuff based on what she wants. You go the places she wants to go and find work to fit in. Snowboarding was the first thing you ever told us you wanted to do, so I wanted to make it happen.”

“I had a really good time.”

“Good. I did too.”

When Killua was suitably clean he dragged Gon into switching places so he could return the favour, running his hands through dark, wet hair and smiling at Gon's peaceful face. 

“We make a pretty good team, right?” Killua asked faintly, his cheeks flushing pink. “You and me.”

“A good couple?” Gon smirked. “Yes, we do.”

“And you're not sick of me yet?”

“Not even remotely.”

Finally both clean, they headed outside and slipped into the scorching water, their numb bodies quickly flooding with heat. It was a peaceful little area marked out with decorative plants and rocks, behind tall trees to keep away prying eyes. The stars were lighting up above them, and side by side Killua and Gon leaned back to admire them, letting the heat soothe their aching muscles. 

“What do you think we should do next?” Killua asked quietly, “now that we've conquered sledding and snowboarding.”

“Build snowmen.”

“We can do that.”

“And have a snowball fight.”

“That might get dangerous, with the two of us involved.”

“Maybe,” Gon laughed. “A snowball playfight?”

“We could try. I was thinking after snow, though. Like, in a few weeks when we move on, where do you think we should go?”

“You were at a beach before, right?”

“Yeah, but we can go to another if you want, Alluka liked the beach anyway.”

“Maybe. How about a jungle? That could be exciting.”

“I'll look into it.”

“Or... Where's your favourite store? You said you know all the best cake places and chocolate places, which one is your absolute, number one favourite in the whole wide world?”

“Wow, that's a tough call. I'd have to think about it. But yeah, I could take you to one.”

“Oh, oh!” Gon sat up quickly, beaming with his new idea. “Is there a city you haven't found one in yet? I'd like to find you a new favourite together.”

“That one sounds like a really good idea,” Killua smiled, letting his eyes fall closed. “I like that one a lot.”

“It's settled, then. We'll find a new best-cake-store-ever. Maybe it'll even turn out to be number one in the world!”

“Anywhere I go with you is number one in the world.”

“Awww.” Gon threw himself at Killua with a splash, hugging him tightly. “Killua!~”

“Get off me,” Killua laughed, shoving him off teasingly. “Don't be so sappy.”

“You're the one who said it!”

“Well now I'm taking it back.”

“Killuaaaa”

“Okay, okay! Come here.”

He opened one eye and let Gon climb into his lap, winding his arms around his waist and holding him in close.

“Happy now?”

“Uh-huh.” He paused, cocking his head to one side thoughtfully. “Killua?”

“Yeah?”

“I can't kiss you from here.”

Killua loosened his grip a little when he started to move, flooding red when Gon turned around and planted himself in Killua's lap the other way around. He tried to ignore how damn close their crotches were as Gon leaned in, holding Killua's cheeks between his warm hands as he brought their lips together.

“I'm glad you kissed me that one night,” Gon grinned, pressing their foreheads together lightly. “I would never have done it first, and I feel like you would have taken a while if it wasn't right then.”

“Yeah right,” Killua scoffed. “I've wanted to kiss you for years, I'm surprised I held out so long.”

“Is it okay if I tell Mito-san about us?”

“Yeah, of course. Alluka knows, after all.”

“Okay. I keep thinking maybe I should tell her, but it makes me nervous to think about it.”

“You know she has probably guessed by now, right? With all the pining for me you did, she'd have to be an idiot not to.”

“I didn't pine!”

“Yeah right.”

Gon pulled a face, bracing his hands on Killua's shoulders to be sure Killua saw it.

“We could go visit her,” Killua suggested, tugging at Gon's pouty lower lip. “After we find a new cake shop. Maybe we could even take her one, if they'll keep for long enough.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, I'm sure Alluka would like to see the island.”

“Okay. So two more weeks of snow, then the best cake shop in the world, then Whale Island?”

“Sounds like a plan.”

“And you won't get sick of me following you around?”

“Maybe, we'll see.”

Gon punched him and Killua couldn't help but laugh, squinting when Gon splashed him in the face.

“I'm kidding!” he insisted, “quit it!”

“You're so mean today!”

Killua locked his hands together at the back of Gon's neck and pulled him in firmly, stopping with their lips millimetres apart.

“Are you gonna stop whining now?”

“Are you gonna stop teasing?”

“Are you gonna make me?”

Gon's eyes flashed with something wild, and he slid forward a little futher on Killua's lap, watching pale cheeks burn red. He pressed his lips to Killua's firmly, like their lives depended on it, and for a long while the only sounds in the hot spring were harried breaths and chirping crickets.

“Killua?” Gon asked breathlessly.

“Yeah?”

“Do you still like me?”

Killua shoved him off with a splash, ignoring the spluttered laughs that came out of the boy as he tried not to swallow the water. By the time he composed himself Killua was climbing out of the water, and Gon pouted again when he looked back.

“Come on,” Killua said softly, holding out a hand. “Let's go home and cuddle.”

“You promise?”

“I promise.”

/// fin ///

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Follow me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/SaysiOnTwit) and support my writing endeavors or find my other social links etc [here](https://www.saysiwrites.info)


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